There is no difference of opinion ever about the value of kindness, goodness and gentleness. Many a hard nuts that could not have otherwise been cracked generally give away to kindness. In fact in all studies and strategies taught to managers today it is suggested with force for being kind and good when brokering a business deal or confronting a difficult customer.
Prophets too all along the history of prophethood had been confronted with with very hostile audience who would either no listen to them or turn down the Divine message with utter harshness and rebukes. Yet, Allah always advised the prophets to be kind and gentle in their approach for it is with kindness one can win over even the hardest of hearts.
We share a hadith attributed to Prophet Muhammad ﷺ in the light of reference from Qur'an on the same subject. This Hadith is mentioned in Sunan Ibn Majah / Book 33 Etiquette / كتاب الأدب) / Chapter 9: Gentleness / باب الرِّفْقِ / as Hadith number # 3687 under:
It was narrated from Jarir bin Abdullah Al-Bajali that the Messenger of Allah(ﷺ) said: "Whoever is deprived of gentleness, he is deprived of goodness."
Arabic Text:
حَدَّثَنَا عَلِيُّ بْنُ مُحَمَّدٍ، حَدَّثَنَا وَكِيعٌ، عَنِ الأَعْمَشِ، عَنْ تَمِيمِ بْنِ سَلَمَةَ، عَنْ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ هِلاَلٍ الْعَبْسِيِّ، عَنْ جَرِيرِ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ الْبَجَلِيِّ، قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ـ صلى الله عليه وسلم ـ " مَنْ يُحْرَمِ الرِّفْقَ يُحْرَمِ الْخَيْرَ " .
Grade: Sahih (Darussalam)
The hadith emphasizes the importance of gentleness and kindness in one's actions and character. The hadith can be understood in the context of various teachings in the Quran that highlight the virtues of kindness, compassion, and good conduct.
In the Quran, Allah repeatedly emphasizes the importance of treating others with gentleness and kindness. For example, in Surah Al-Imran (3:159), it is mentioned:
"And by the mercy of Allah, you dealt with them gently. And had you been severe and harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about you."
This verse illustrates that Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was advised by Allah to be gentle with his companions, showing that gentleness fosters stronger bonds and better relationships. Similarly, in Surah An-Nahl (16:125), Allah instructs believers to:
"Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and good instruction, and argue with them in a way that is best."
This verse encourages Muslims to convey the message of Islam with wisdom and gentleness, demonstrating that the manner in which something is conveyed is as important as the message itself.
The life of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) is rich with examples of gentleness, kindness, and goodness. Here are a few notable instances:
- Kindness to Children and the Vulnerable:
- The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was known for his kindness and affection towards children. There are numerous narrations where he would play with children, carry them on his shoulders, and show them love and respect.
- An example is when he allowed his grandchildren, Hasan and Husain, to climb on his back while he was in prostration during prayer. When asked why he did so, he replied that he wanted to prolong his prostration because they were on him.
- Compassion and Mercy:
- The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) showed immense compassion and mercy, even towards his enemies. During the conquest of Mecca, when he had the opportunity to take revenge on those who had persecuted him and his followers for years, he instead forgave them and granted them amnesty.
- He exemplified this mercy in his treatment of prisoners of war, ensuring they were treated humanely and often releasing them without ransom.
- Respect for Others:
- The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) treated everyone with respect and dignity, regardless of their social status. He would listen attentively to people and give them his full attention, making them feel valued and heard.
- An example is when he would shake hands with everyone, from elders to children, and he would never pull his hand away until the other person did.
- Gentleness in Teaching and Advising:
- When correcting others or giving advice, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) would do so gently and with wisdom. He understood the importance of guiding people without harshness or judgment.
- A famous incident is when a Bedouin urinated in the mosque, and some companions wanted to rebuke him harshly. However, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) intervened and asked them to calmly explain to the man that the mosque is a place of worship and purity.
These examples illustrate how the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) embodied gentleness, kindness, and goodness in his daily life. His actions serve as a timeless example for Muslims and people of all faiths on how to interact with others with compassion and respect.
Therefore, the hadith about gentleness can be seen as a practical application of these Quranic teachings. It suggests that a person who lacks gentleness may miss out on opportunities for goodness, both in their interactions with others and in their overall conduct. Gentleness is a trait that not only enhances personal character but also facilitates better communication, understanding, and harmony in society.
May Allāh (سبحانه و تعالى) help us understand Qur'ān and follow the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, which is embodiment of commandments of Allah contained in the Qur'ān. May Allah help us to be like the ones He loves and let our lives be lived helping others and not making others' lives miserable or unlivable. May all our wrong doings, whether intentional or unintentional, be forgiven before the angel of death knocks on our door.
وَمَا عَلَيۡنَاۤ اِلَّا الۡبَلٰغُ الۡمُبِيۡنُ
(36:17) and our duty is no more than to clearly convey the Message.”
That is Our duty is only to convey to you the message that Allah has entrusted us with. Then it is for you to accept it or reject it. We have not been made responsible for making you accept it forcibly, and if you do not accept it, we shall not be seized in consequence of your disbelief, you will yourselves be answerable for your actions on Day of Resurrection.
May Allah forgive me if my posts ever imply a piety far greater than I possess. I am most in need of guidance.
Reading the Qur'ān should be a daily obligation of a Muslim - Reading it with translation will make it meaningful. But reading its Exegesis / Tafsir will make you understand it fully. It will also help the Muslims to have grasp over social issues and their answers discussed in the Qur'an and other matter related to inter faith so that they are able to discuss issues with non-Muslims with authority based on refences from Qur'an.
Note: When we mention God in our posts, we mean One True God, we call Allah in Islam, with no associates. Allah is the Sole Creator of all things, and that Allah is all-powerful and all-knowing. Allah has no offspring, no race, no gender, no body, and is unaffected by the characteristics of human life.
Please refer to our exclusive reference page Etiquettes taught by Prophet Muhammad ﷺ for more etiquettes attributed to Prophet Muhammad.
You may also refer to our reference page: Sunnah and Hadith of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ to know more about sunnah of Prophet of Allah. You may also refer to our Reference Pages for knowing more about Islam and Qur'ān.
Disclaimer: The material for this post has been collected from the references as given below. If anyone differs with the material contained in this post, one may consult the references and their authors. If someone has more material about the subject, he/she is most welcome to share in the comments box to make the post all encompassing.
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