The negative fallout of being angry always outweigh its positive face, if any. And this is the reason, anger management is become a subject in its self and psychologists around the world are constantly looking ways and means to tame the angry and let them live in peace, for anger leaves many harmful within one self. Today, study of Anger management means recognizing, controlling, and expressing anger in a healthy and constructive way so that it does not harm yourself, your relationships, or your surroundings.
Remember, Anger Management is not about suppressing anger completely — because anger is a natural human emotion — but about learning how to handle it wisely.
Let us understand why people get angry, how and why they must control and restrain their emotional state and how Islam helps in anger management.
Why People Get Angry
Before we come to the Islamic concept of anger management, let us first hurriedly run down on some factors due to which anger often arises. This negative emotional state occurs when:
- Ego is hurt — feeling disrespected, insulted, or ignored.
- Injustice is perceived — either real or imagined.
- Unmet expectations — when things don’t go our way.
- Frustration or stress — from personal or environmental pressures.
- Envy or jealousy — seeing others enjoy something we don’t have.
- Lack of patience — reacting impulsively instead of with reflection.
- Provocation from others — deliberate or accidental.
Why Restraining anger is important?
- Health: The first effect of the emotional outburst falls on the health of the one being angry, specially those who are unable to control their anger and get angry much too often. Such people who have chronic history of getting angry are often found to be suffering from high blood pressure, heart disease, anxiety, and depression.
- Relationships: Poorly handled anger damages trust and respect. And if the angry mindset becomes a habit, one start to lose near and dear ones, and finally his friends, leaving him all alone in a vacuum with no one around to console or to tame.
- Decision-Making: Anger clouds judgment and leads to impulsive, regretful actions. Leaders, managers and men at the helm of the affair suffer because of their angry mindset for it mars taking correct decisions. Anger usually let a man take a hasty decision which hurts one's positions, business and standing.
What to Do?
We could go on listing the remedial measures as listed in studies on Anger Management, but these could be read from any media or by attending a course on anger management. But we will restrict ourselves the concept of anger management as taught in Qur'an when it was revealed more than fourteen centuries ago and in the saying of Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم. The mere mention of restraining one's anger in a Divine Book, that is Al Qur'an, and emphasis by Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم suggests the gravity of being anger and its effects on man.
In Islam, anger is viewed as a natural human emotion but one that must be controlled, not allowed to control us.
Islam provides a comprehensive framework for managing anger, emphasizing self-control, patience, and seeking refuge in Allah. The Quran and Hadith offer guidance on how to address anger constructively. Below, I’ll outline key teachings and quote relevant verses and hadiths.
Quranic Teachings on Anger Management
The Quran encourages believers to restrain anger, practice forgiveness, and maintain patience, as these qualities are associated with righteousness and closeness to Allah.
- Restraining Anger and Practicing Forgiveness:
- Quran 3:134:
- "Those who spend [in Allah’s cause] during ease and hardship and who restrain anger and who pardon the people – and Allah loves the doers of good."
- This verse praises those who control their anger and choose forgiveness, highlighting it as a characteristic of the righteous.
- This verse highlights three progressive steps:
- Control the reaction (restrain anger).
- Forgive.
- Do good to the one who wronged you.
- Patience and Forbearance:
- Quran 42:37: "And those who avoid the major sins and immoralities, and when they are angry, they forgive."
- The Quran emphasizes that forgiveness, even in moments of anger, is a virtue of those who avoid major sins.
- Seeking Refuge from Satan:
- Quran 41:36: "And if there comes to you from Satan an evil suggestion, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is the Hearing, the Knowing."
- Anger is often linked to Satan’s influence, and seeking Allah’s protection helps calm the heart and mind.
- Patience as a Virtue:
- Quran 2:153: "O you who have believed, seek help through patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with the patient."
- Patience (sabr) is a key tool for managing emotions, including anger, and is reinforced through prayer.
- Avoid Hastiness in Anger
- "And hasten not with the Qur’an before its revelation is completed to you..." (20:114)
- Although this verse is context-specific, scholars also use it to show that rushing in any matter — including speech in anger — is discouraged.
Hadith Teachings on Anger Management
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) provided practical advice and spiritual guidance for controlling anger. Below are key hadiths:
- Anger as a Burning Coal:
- Hadith (Sunan Ibn Majah 4189): The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "Beware of anger, for it is a burning coal on the heart of the son of Adam. Do you not notice the swelling of the veins of his neck and the redness of his eyes? If anyone feels that, let him sit down if he is standing, and lie down if he is sitting."
- This hadith describes the physical signs of anger and suggests changing one’s physical state to calm down.
- Silence During Anger:
- Hadith (Sahih al-Bukhari 6116): The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "If one of you becomes angry, let him be silent."
- Silence prevents rash words or actions that may lead to regret.
- Changing Position:
- Hadith (Sunan Abi Dawud 4782): The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "If one of you becomes angry while standing, he should sit down. If the anger does not go away, he should lie down."
- This practical advice helps diffuse anger by altering one’s physical posture.
- Seeking Refuge from Satan:
- Hadith (Sahih al-Bukhari 3282): The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "I know a word, the saying of which will cause the anger to go away from him: if he says, ‘A’udhu billahi min ash-shaytan ir-rajim’ (I seek refuge with Allah from the accursed devil), his anger will go away."
- Reciting this dua helps redirect focus to Allah and counters Satan’s influence.
- Strength in Controlling Anger:
- Hadith (Sahih Muslim 2609): The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "The strong man is not the one who can wrestle, but it is the one who controls himself when he is angry."
- This emphasizes that true strength lies in self-restraint.
- Performing Wudu (Ablution):
- Hadith (Sunan Abi Dawud 4784): The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "Anger comes from the devil, the devil was created from fire, and fire is extinguished only with water. So, when one of you becomes angry, he should perform wudu."
- Ablution is a practical and spiritual act to cool down anger.
Practical Islamic Strategies for Anger Management
Based on the Quran and Hadith, Islam suggests the following steps:
- Pause and Stay Silent: Avoid speaking or acting impulsively when angry.
- Change Position: Sit or lie down to physically disrupt the anger response.
- Perform Wudu: Use water to calm both body and mind.
- Seek Refuge in Dedication: Recite A’udhu billahi min ash-shaytan ir-rajim to ward off Satan’s influence.
- Practice Patience and Forgiveness: Reflect on Quranic teachings to cultivate a forgiving mindset.
- Pray and Reflect: Turn to Allah through prayer to seek patience and guidance.
One has to be a true believer, who must understand the instructions given in Qur'an and Hadith and implement these in one's daily life, be at home or without, in office, in business or among people and friends. And the best antidote for anger management is Sabr - Patience. For it is patience which restrains one's anger and his faith in Allah for whatever happens to one, is from Allah and one must accept the Devine decree and observe patience. Those who are patient and persevere inn times of stress, pass the Devine tests and are finally awarded with the mercy and grace of Allah.
You may like to read our earlier posts on anger management in Islam from links given below:
May Allāh (سبحانه و تعالى) help us understand Qur'ān and follow the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, which is embodiment of commandments of Allah contained in the Qur'ān. May Allah help us to be like the ones He loves and let our lives be lived helping others and not making others' lives miserable or unlivable. May all our wrong doings, whether intentional or unintentional, be forgiven before the angel of death knocks on our door.
وَمَا عَلَيۡنَاۤ اِلَّا الۡبَلٰغُ الۡمُبِيۡنُ
(36:17) and our duty is no more than to clearly convey the Message.”
That is Our duty is only to convey to you the message that Allah has entrusted us with. Then it is for you to accept it or reject it. We have not been made responsible for making you accept it forcibly, and if you do not accept it, we shall not be seized in consequence of your disbelief, you will yourselves be answerable for your actions on Day of Resurrection.
May Allah forgive me if my posts ever imply a piety far greater than I possess. I am most in need of guidance.
Reading the Qur'ān should be a daily obligation of a Muslim - Reading it with translation will make it meaningful. But reading its Exegesis / Tafsir will make you understand it fully. It will also help the Muslims to have grasp over social issues and their answers discussed in the Qur'an and other matter related to inter faith so that they are able to discuss issues with non-Muslims with authority based on refences from Qur'an.
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